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News - The future’s bright, if you’re female…

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Will women outperform men entirely within 20 years? It’s the scenario played out in this week’s BBC Two drama documentary If… women ruled the world?

Baroness Greenfield explains why men could be surplus to requirements.

The future could be female for many reasons: perhaps the most obvious is that we will shift increasingly from manufacturing industries, requiring muscle power, to work with our brains in front of the screen.

Women, therefore, will no longer be disadvantaged because they are unable to tote the barge and shift the bale. More importantly, flexible working from home will not be so difficult to combine with looking after children.

If… women ruled the world

Wednesday, 31 March 2004, at 2100 BST on BBC Two

On the other hand, the conflict, that we know all too well, of work versus child-bearing and rearing, might also be helped by technologies enabling us, for example, to freeze and thaw our eggs.

Imagine, therefore, harvesting your eggs at the age of 18 or so when they are in optimum condition, knowing that you could then choose at what stage in your life you might want to reproduce.

You could therefore plan a career and appropriate breaks safe in the knowledge that perhaps with IVF and even a surrogate womb you could, nonetheless, still be a parent.

Genetic donors

In fact, the genetic technologies could well do far more in terms of our concept of birth.

Baroness Susan Greenfield


Separating reproduction from sex does not disenfranchise men entirely



Baroness Susan Greenfield

Some might think that men will no longer be needed; indeed, it could be possible in the longer future to extract genetic material from any cell in the body and combine it in an evacuated egg so that any one of any sexual orientation of any age could become parents.

This scenario has raised the strange prospect of at least possibly six parents: genetic donors, the donor of the egg, the donor of the womb and, indeed the people who brought the child up.

On the other hand, separating reproduction from sex does not disenfranchise men entirely: we are a very long way from the Orgasmatron of Barbarella fame. Indeed, it is hard to see how cyber simulation could substitute for a fulfilling, loving and physical relationship.

Then again, it could well be that the new technologies render us more autistic: less inclined and able to communicate, and therefore happier in front of a screen rather than talking to, let alone loving, our fellow man.

We could face a scenario where the old divisions between masculinity and femininity do, indeed, cease to have any use or need.

By this time, human beings, as we know them, will have changed so dramatically that we could no longer assume we would be in a “It’s Raining Men” type-world, in which women were just naturally dominant, and males the subordinate group.

More probably, it is not so much that men could be extinct, as opposed to our family lives changing dramatically.

Just as the barrier between work and leisure is eroded, so will be the barrier between retirement and work, a job for life, as well as the generational child/parent/grandparent storyline that we are used to.


Baroness Greenfield took part in the BBC television programme If… women ruled the world.

The programme was broadcast in the UK on BBC Two on Wednesday, 31 March, 2004 at 2100 BST.



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News - Prostitution ‘increases’ in India

Source: News - Prostitution ‘increases’ in India
The number of prostitutes in India has risen by 50% in less than a decade, according to a new survey.


Two million sex workers in 1997 had risen to three million by 2003-04, the government-commissioned study said.


Many prostitutes are said to be underage, entering the sex trade between the ages of 12 and 15.


The study was conducted by an NGO which interviewed 9,500 prostitutes in 31 states and federal territories across the country over two years.


Government officials, police, journalists, social workers and NGOs working with prostitutes were also interviewed.


More than 35% of prostitutes enter the sex trade before the age of 18

Report author Dr KK Mukherjee


Although poverty, illiteracy and ignorance remain the most common factors for women to enter the sex trade, other factors have also emerged, the study says.


“New stimulating factors are a change in attitudes towards sex, migration, globalisation, increase in hospitality industries and the desire for a physical relationship with multiple partners,” Dr KK Mukherjee, who conducted the study, says.


Delhi and Mumbai


Andhra Pradesh and West Bengal states together account for 26% of the total number of prostitutes in the country, but Delhi and Mumbai (Bombay) are said to be the preferred places of operation.


Dr Mukherjee says a large number of girls from Bangladesh identify themselves as being from West Bengal, making the state a high supply zone.


Women from Nepal are also part of the sex trade in India.


The study found that 90% of the prostitutes are in the 15-35 age group and their average work life spans 15 years.


“There is a great demand for younger girls and more than 35% of prostitutes enter the sex trade before the age of 18,” Dr Mukherjee said.


The study also found that while a majority of prostitutes are from lower castes, 40% were from the upper castes, which Dr Mukherjee said was a new trend. The trade is also spread across all religions.


Varying rates


The prostitutes operate in a wide range of venues, ranging from hotels to cyber cafes.


There is a wide disparity in their incomes.


Prostitutes operating on the street and brothels earn between 2,000 to 24,000 rupees ($43-522) per month, whereas call girls make 40,000-800,000 rupees ($870-17,300).


Dr Mukherjee says the rise in prostitution could be controlled by channelling economic development to areas where the sex trade is prevalent.


He also says most prostitutes do not want their profession to be legalised as they prefer to work in secrecy. Only those sex workers who operate in red-light areas are making such demands, he says.


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News - CCTV picture may be sex attacker

A CCTV image has been issued of a man who may have sexually assaulted a woman in Norwich 10 days ago.

The 23-year-old victim was attacked in a secluded courtyard near to the Wig and Pen public house on St Martins at Palace Plain.

Detectives investigating the assault, which happened at about at about 0300 BST on Saturday 13 September, have been studying CCTV images from in and around the city.

They have released an image of a man walking along the pavement on Queens Road towards the junction with St Stephens Road at 0426 BST.

‘Terrible and traumatic’

Police spokeswoman Nina Goad said: “The image is unclear but we are hoping it may jog somebody’s memory who was in the area at the time and recalls seeing a man walking on the pavement wearing a dark shirt and lighter coloured trousers.

“This was a terrible and traumatic experience for the victim to have to endure.

“It is extremely important that anyone with information contacts the police or Crimestoppers.”

The man in the image is described as about 5 ft 8 ins tall and of medium build.

He has short dark hair and was wearing a dark casual shirt with short sleeves or the sleeves rolled up. His trousers were lighter.

Officers would also like to speak to any guesthouse or hotel owners in the area who may have had someone matching the man’s description staying with them recently.


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News - Trapping Cambodia’s sex tourists

Read source of it on the News - Trapping Cambodia’s sex tourists site
Geoff is sitting on a small, hard bed in a Cambodian brothel, his heart thumping fast.

He is 49 years old, a retired Australian diplomat with a wife and two grown-up children.

After a long, tense wait, a grinning teenaged boy opens the door and pushes in two young girls.

One says she is seven years old. The other is nine.

The younger one seems as nervous as Geoff, breathing heavily, as the boy explains exactly what she will do for $60.

Geoff sits back on the bed, a deliberately casual move, but it enables the top button on his shirt to point directly towards the girls’ faces.

Hidden within that button is a tiny video camera and microphone.

‘Drugged’

A sign in Phnom Penh warning about child sexual exploitation

Authorities are warning about the dangers of child sex tourism

Geoff, not his real name, is an undercover investigator wading through the depravity of Cambodia’s paedophile industry.

He works for an international organisation dedicated to fighting injustice.

“The adrenalin is always pumping,” he says, “no matter how many times you do it.”

More often that not, the girls are drugged.

One of them described it to Geoff as feeling “like you’re not really there.” Some get an injection before each client.

Geoff works mainly in the capital, Phnom Penh, walking along grimy, jostling streets.

In the city centre there are plenty of brothels popular with so-called sex tourists.

Many of the girls in them are obviously under 18, the age of consent here, but their clients either do not realise, or do not care.

But out in the suburbs are places like Svay Pak.

For years this narrow clutter of bars and coffee shops has hidden what many believe was the world’s top destination for paedophiles.

Geoff is well prepared.

He has his hidden camera, a can of pepper spray, a tracking device, and at least four assistants at close hand, ready to spring him if things turn ugly.

Many brothels are run by ruthless Vietnamese gangs.

Some are owned or protected by senior Cambodian police officers.

“The risks are real,” says Geoff. “My wife was concerned to start with, but she’s very supportive now.”

Undercover

Inside the brothel, Geoff is often trapped behind up to three sets of locked doors.

Only then are the children brought out and offered to him.

He talks, films, then uses one of half a dozen standard excuses to leave. “I’m just going to go and get a friend, and we’ll be back soon.”


Sometimes the foreign tourists are only arrested when they get back to their own countries and confronted with Geoff’s footage

Once he walked in on an elderly European man, raping an eight-year-old girl. “For like two seconds,” he says, “I just couldn’t move.

“I remember seeing his clothes hanging on a peg. I guess it’s lucky we’re not allowed to be armed. I could have…” his voice trails off.

Instead, Geoff stuck to his undercover role, and closed the door.

Outside, a few minutes later, he alerted the police, but the man slipped out through a back door.

Local involvement

It can be frustrating, Geoff admits, but there is the compensation of knowing that as a direct result of his work, seven foreign paedophiles have been arrested in the past year-and-a-half.

And today Svay Pak is pretty much closed down, although Geoff knows that the children and their handlers will simply have moved on somewhere else.

Sometimes the foreign tourists are only arrested when they get back to their own countries and are confronted with Geoff’s footage.

But the vast majority of cases involve Cambodians.

Moral dilemma

In February, Geoff gave evidence at a local trial in Phnom Penh. He co-operates closely, but secretly, with the Cambodian police.

The judge questioned three girls, aged 13 and 14, who had been rescued from a brothel.

They told their story, then asked the judge if they could stay and hear their abuser sentenced.

He got 15 years. “Not long enough,” the girls told Geoff.


Most diplomats have privately accused the foreign group of doing more harm than good

As you can imagine, Geoff’s work is rarely straightforward. There is corruption in the police force and there are other complications and ethical dilemmas about his job.

Say he asks a pimp to provide him with lots of girls or boys, is Geoff helping to rescue victims or could he be encouraging the brothel to go out and search for new children to corrupt?

Local involvement

A few months ago, another foreign group working to protect children from the sex industry organised a raid on a brothel.

It turned out the place was owned by a particularly powerful policeman.

A huge scandal followed and now everyone is jittery.

Most diplomats have privately accused the foreign group of doing more harm than good.

And Geoff complains that it now takes him many days, instead of hours, to get the police to authorise new raids.

But still he is busy.

When I called him yesterday he sounded elated. He had just finished another raid.

Three girls rescued, the youngest aged eleven. Two Vietnamese adults now in jail.

Geoff comes across as the solid, unflappable type. At weekends he plays rugby.

“After each operation,” he says, “I need to take a couple of deep breaths. But there is no psychological damage, at least nothing now.

“Someone has to do this job. I guess it might as well be me.”

From Our Own Correspondent was broadcast on Saturday, 11 June, 2005 at 1130 BST on BBC Radio 4. Please check the programme schedules for World Service transmission times.


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News - From homemaking to safe sex

Polyester A-line navy blue skirts, woggles, itchy air hostess-style hats, sewn-on badges for homemaking, first aid, making fires, knots and doing semaphore - my memories of the girl guides circa 1984.

But, it seems, life for a 21st-century member of the UK’s largest youth organisation for girls is now a very different experience.

Young women have ditched the woggles and navy skirts for T-shirts, rugby shirts, hoodies and jeans.

And while they can still learn how to make fires and administer first aid, they also get badges for knowledge of healthy lifestyles, world issues, circus skills, films and mastering the computer.

Flat-pack skills

Homemaking - one of the more backward-looking badges from my guiding days - has vanished, something a politically minded friend of mine will be pleased to hear after her 80s protest against it due to being a self-declared young “feminist”.

Guide badges from 1910 (Pic: Girlguiding UK)

In 1910 badges were earned for milking cows and lace making

But, with a survey this week revealing that young women now want to learn about safe sex, assembling flat-pack furniture, managing money and writing a CV, it seems the guiding movement in the UK may well be forced to change yet further.

Denise King, chief executive of Girlguiding UK, says it has been essential for the movement to “constantly evolve” during its 97-year history to keep pace with the changing needs of members.

“But while the detail of what we offer our members has changed, our traditional values have stayed constant,” she says.

“We have always aimed to help girls and young women gain the confidence, skills and experiences necessary to broaden their horizons and reach for new goals.”

Two girl guides today (Pic: Girlguiding UK)

Modern guide uniforms are more casual

And the movement has changed a great deal since it was set up in 1910 after a group of girls turned up the previous year at a Scouting rally at Crystal Palace demanding to join in with the boys.

At that time, young women were given awards for milking cows, making lace, carpentry and sending telegraphs.

And in 1957 badges included Homemaker (lay and light a fire, make beds, make a jam or pickle), Commonwealth (keep a scrapbook about a colony), Hostess and even Rabbit Keeper.

Changing roles

But 50 years later, young women are now able to learn how to plan parties, use computers and live independently as well as cycle and travel the world.

Another type of merit even allows young guides to participate in beauty-related activities such as having face masks, massages and manicures.

Guide badges from 1957 and today (Pic: Girlguiding UK)

The Commonwealth badge of 1957 and the party planner of today

“Guiding has evolved over time, just as the roles of women in society have,” Ms King says. “The badges have changed over time, in line with our members’ needs and interests.”

And this has been the secret of its continuing success, she insists.

According to the movement, more than half of women in Britain have been involved in guiding at some point during their lives, with celebrity members including presenters Cat Deeley, Lorraine Kelly and Carole Vorderman, cook Delia Smith and model Kate Moss.

There are currently 10 million members worldwide, of which 500,000 are in the UK. And there is even a waiting list of 50,000.

“Most importantly, guiding is fun,” Ms King says, explaining its popularity. “We give girls and young women an opportunity to gain new experiences, learn new skills, and make friends in a safe, girl-only environment.”

Adult members

And while guiding - including brownies and the older guides - mainly include girls between the ages of seven and 14, some stay on into adulthood.

Emma Joyce, 23, from Chiswick, west London, is still a member after joining as a seven-year-old and believes the movement and its badges are still relevant to young girls.

Guides in 1910 (Pic: Girlguiding UK)

Guides looked very different in 1910

“As with any organisation, to keep people interested it has to evolve and change with society,” she says.

“I think the movement modernised recently and started to take girls seriously and give them a voice. The badges have changed too, for example we now have computing and communication.

“It is all about working in the community, meeting new people - it is a great social thing as well as being active.”

So although the itchy hats and the homemaking have gone, the institution of girl guiding looks set to stay.


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News - Teachers in ‘web bullying’ call

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Scottish teachers have called for action to be taken to stop pupils “cyber bullying” school staff.


Some websites encourage pupils to submit anonymous “reviews” of their teachers’ performance.


The Scottish Secondary Teachers Association said the sites often hosted insulting comments that were left in an attempt to humiliate staff.


The union said all material should be monitored to ensure it was suitable before being made available to view.


The SSTA also called for video hosting sites like YouTube to crack down on pupils who post footage of teachers that has been filmed in class on mobile phones.


Huge upset


The US-based RateMyTeachers website carries comments about individual, named teachers.


Remarks left on the site have included: “I have heard awful rumours about that man” and “he is evil personified”.


Both YouTube and RateMyTeachers agree to delete material if they receive a complaint, but Ann Ballinger of the SSTA said it was often too late to prevent teachers being embarrassed.


Speaking ahead of the union’s annual congess which starts on Friday in Aviemore, Mrs Ballinger said: “They can be so destructive. They can damage a teacher’s professional life, damage their home life and they can cause huge upset to the teacher and their families.”


Mr Ballinger cited a recent example when the son of a male teacher read comments on the web questioning his father’s sexuality and accusing him of having inappropriate relationships with other members of staff.


Now it seems that teachers are acting like children who are easily offended by the gossip of school kids

Stuart Waiton
Generation Youth Issues


Last month, teachers in England threatened to sue websites that allow pupils to post abuse and humiliating video clips and photographs of them on the internet.


The Association of Teachers and Lecturers said some of its members had considered leaving the profession because of the extreme distress the sites had caused them.


But Stuart Waiton, director of child rights organisation Generation Youth Issues, said teachers should learn to develop thick skins.


He added: “In the past, teachers would tell children that sticks and stones might break their bones but words will never harm them.


“Now it seems that teachers are acting like children who are easily offended by the gossip of school kids.


“If teachers are so chronically offended I would suggest they go and get another profession.”


Posted lies


A video circulated among pupils at Hawick High in January showed the school’s new headteacher being punched in the face by a teenage boy.


Elswehere, footage appeared on YouTube of a pupil pulling down his teacher’s trousers in a classroom in Cumbernauld while his friends filmed it on a mobile phone.


A female teacher discovered that a photograph of her face had been superimposed on a naked body and circulated on the web.


Another teacher learned that a female pupil had posted lies about her sex life.


Photographs of teachers’ cleavage or underwear have also been made available to view on the internet.


Source: News - Teachers in ‘web bullying’ call
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News - Confessions of a game widow

My boyfriend is leading a double life.


During daylight hours he holds down a respectable office job and makes complicated decisions. By night, he is a hardened soldier who spends his time planting bombs and capturing flags.

When he’s not doing that, he works as a scientist in the dangerous trouble spot known as City 17.


But this is no international man of mystery. Instead, he’s an online hero who gets his kicks on virtual battlefields.


Yes, my man is addicted to Halo 2 and Half-Life 2. And I am a games widow.


Are you a game widow or widower? Read your comments

Halo 2; Half-Life 2; Killzone; Getaway 2: Black Monday. So many pre-Christmas games releases, so little time. I should be grateful he doesn’t play GTA: San Andreas, he tells me. Or Need for Speed: Underground 2. Or indeed Fifa 2005. Yet.


Half-Life monologue

It wasn’t always like this. The living room hasn’t always been a mess of cables, controllers and consoles. He kept his other life on the PC in the spare room. But then along came consoles, the broadband connection and whole new worlds opened up online.

Artwork from Half-Life 2

Assume the identity of Gordon Freeman in Half-Life 2

Now he sits in front of the TV for hours at a time, while exhorting his clan-mates to “get in the cave!” or “back me up, we’re supposed to be a team”, or exchanging grunts with American teenagers.


Nor does it stop when he has prised himself away from the console. I am treated to monologues on the relative merits of his opponents (”useless”), or the “filmic” qualities of Half-Life 2.


I should point out that I know how easy it is to be seduced by the winking black box in the corner, having myself had an intense yet brief infatuation with games in the past.


We have reached a compromise of sorts, whereby he arranges gaming evenings with his friends only when I am out, and the rest of the time he plays only in short bursts.


But it looks like his obsession is here to stay.


I take scant consolation from knowing that I cannot be alone in my suffering.

With big-name games selling by the bucketload in the run-up to Christmas, and the fact that thousands of people are signing up to broadband each week in the UK, the online gaming bug must be infecting many relationships.


At this point, there can be only one solution: if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. Let’s get together and form a clan. We can call ourselves the Game Widows.


Click here to return



Our relationship ended and he admits now it was down to the PlayStation



Melissa, UK

My relationship of six years ended because of the PlayStation. When our son was born my partner spent all his time playing games. We never went to bed at the same time due to him staying up as he wanted just to get to a certain level. He slept during the day due to being up all night and I was left holding the baby literally. Our relationship ended and he admits now it was down to the PlayStation. I am happy now and have a new partner who does not own a games console. Every cloud has a silver lining.


Melissa,
Blackpool, UK

My husband suffers a terrible addiction to EverQuest. He even has withdrawal symptoms when we’re on holiday, slackened only by finding an internet connection to check on the status of his fellow players. He plays at least eight hours a day, not coming to bed until 3am most mornings. I’ve become so accustomed to seeing only the back of his head, that I am shocked when I see his face. I’ll sign up to the Games Widow clan!
Patricia, UK

What about the game widowers? My wife is addicted to patience type card games and Tetris. This is not a recent 3D technological phenomenon
Nick, UK/Swiss

I am a gamer and love to play cyber soldier. My significant other doesn’t play games at all but understands that this is something I enjoy. There is no reason why I can’t play video games for hours at a time as long as I spend the same energy and attention on her later. A little understanding in both directions goes a long way.
Veebs, UK

All these articles about “my boyfriend” “my husband” etc, it works both ways, it’s not just men. Worst thing or best thing I ever done was to introduce my wife to the world of computers and games, I never see her any more. Every waking moment she is playing games. Its not just men there is a large growing number of women gamers on and offline.
Paul, UK

My boyfriend used to have a PS2 until it was stolen in a burglary. He used to play every now and then but I often ended up going to bed alone, waiting for him to stop playing. Now he intends on buying anther one for himself, solely to play GTA: San Andreas. I gave him a simple option: “Buy a new console, get yourself a new girlfriend.” I think he got the point.
Sophie, Paris, France

I think if it wasn’t games it would be football, or the pub. At least you know where he is and what he’s doing, sounds a bit invasive when it’s in your living room, though! Hopefully you’ve also got other interests and you can spend some time together as well.
James Bradbury, Chippenham, UK

I was with a gamer for years and in the end there was only one solution, he got dumped.
Katie, Bournemouth, England

My boyfriend and I play consoles together. We buy games that two people can play, or take turns. It’s a hobby that we both share and enjoy.


Megan,
UK

My husband is a huge PC games fan. After a little while trying to compete with the games I gave in, and joined in. We now have an affordable hobby that we can do together, and meet new people. And we have met a lot of very nice people, a number of which came to our wedding. Gaming isn’t all bad!
Sarah, UK



It does put a strain on the relationship, and I know I am at fault for spending hours in front of a game



Richard, UK

I’m a gaming addict, I’ll admit, a fussy one though! It does put a strain on the relationship, and I know I am at fault for spending hours in front of a game, but I’ve not found many two-player games that aren’t repetitive thus extending their replay value. Ones that we would both enjoy.
Richard, UK

My wife and previous girlfriends have made me watch endless fictional stories for hours each night - soap operas, to spend “quality time together”. I still do, but now I have my own hobby and she can join in the gaming if she wants to.
Adam, UK

I have to admit this article made me chuckle. Despite being a hardcore gamer, I always have time for my girlfriend. Ok so when Half-Life 2 came out I spend 19 hours over two days just playing without much contact with my girlfriend but we agreed we would have a nice weekend after Half Life 2 was completed.
John Wilson, UK

I have been an online gamer for several years now; a virtual soldier in America’s Army. It cost me a relationship that I wish I hadn’t lost and it made me realise that I had accomplished very little during that time. In retrospect I think that just a few hours a week away from my PC and with my former girlfriend instead would have been enough to save our relationship.

It’s not all bad though, the friends I’ve made through my online experience are great. Most of us have stopped playing games now, but we still keep in touch despite living in three different countries.
David, England



I guess that it’s mainly women that are moaning about it, but ladies please remember the times that we banned our other halves from breathing when watching our soaps, Sex In The City, Friends, or in my case Buffy



Trish, England

Since I met my partner I’ve been a Megadrive, Saturn, N64, Playstation, PC and Xbox widow!I’ve even recently had to wrestle one of those retro 5000 games in one pad things out of his hands. But the way I see it is I can still see him, I know that he’s safe and not drunk in a gutter somewhere, and in the past we’ve even found one or two games in common. I guess that it’s mainly women that are moaning about it, but ladies please remember the times that we banned our other halves from breathing when watching our soaps, Sex In The City, Friends, or in my case Buffy. They suffer too. Or at least that’s what he tries to tell me!


Trish, England

People think I’m a ‘console widow’ but I’m not, I actively encourage my husband with his gaming to the disbelief of many! When the Xbox came out, I was first in queue to get him one, and I’ve got him an Xbox Crystal for this Christmas because it just looks so cool doesn’t it? I pre-ordered him Halo2 in a limited box edition set and he travelled into work with me on the morning of release to pick it up and go home and play it! I organise Xbox evenings for him and I put on food for him and his mates so that they have a great evening. But , I’ve always been into games myself, so this is why I’m probably like this unlike all of my friends who think I’m mad.



I do make him watch some dire television though and he doesn’t grumble



Patricia, UK

I just understand perhaps the sudden necessary bursts of gaming that have to be done when a new game comes out, and it also means I get a great lie-in at the weekend because my husband and step-daughter sneak downstairs early to get a barrel load of gaming in before I get up. I do make him watch some dire television though and he doesn’t grumble. In fact he was quite happily watching Strictly Come Dancing Xmas final last night with actually enjoying it!
Patricia, UK

My girlfriend must be very lucky, I don’t watch football and certainly don’t play computer games. I stopped when I left my teenage years. There are so many exciting, healthy things to do, alone or together. And no we never waste our days off shopping or anything mundane like that. People should try enjoying there homes, partners, friends and family more. Then again when people are playing computer games, the cycle paths, hills, mountains etc are just that little bit quieter.
Chris, UK

I’m a hardened PC gamer, and admit that sometimes it gets in the way of RL (or Real Life) but in my opinion gaming is much better for you then just sitting in front of the telly watching inane game shows, soaps and sitcoms. At least I interact with the people I play with, and all the while I learn more about the technology used in the games and systems we use, which can be used in other areas, employment for example. Surely that’s better then wondering who is sleeping with whom or what the next ‘hilarious’ catchphrase from some comedy is!
Luke, London, UK



I think the ‘widows’ should be taking some responsibility here and try and amuse us once in a while



Sarge, UK

I love computer games and am a self-confessed games addict but would never let it come in the way of a relationship. Unless, of course, my partner was very boring. I think the ‘widows’ should be taking some responsibility here and try and amuse us once in a while. Yes, I am single.
Sarge, Birmingham, UK

Ah, so I am not alone then? Me and my husband have separate lives, he’s always in bed hours after me due to gaming. Even on holiday he had to go to the internet cafe every day to play. I don’t let it bother me, I’m not even that interested in the TV, never mind a computer game! Just remember they could be up to a lot worse!
Mags, UK

I have a gaming addict husband and whilst he tends to organise nights and specific gaming times, it does seem as though he is waiting for any slight lapse of my consciousness/attention to leap across the lounge and flick the switch on the Xbox. A slight closing of tired eyes late at night or even just getting up and going to the loo and I return to find him with the console gripped in his palm and headphones strapped to his head. He’ll then say in such an innocent voice; “Oh I thought you’d gone to bed!” However I can’t complain too much, I’d rather be married to a gaming addict than most other addicts I can think of!
Jen, England



A bit of time to remember he’s a dad as well as a husband would be the nice, just to show us he’s not turned into some deaf, selfish Elf at Christmas



Andrea, England

It wasn’t until the introduction of online gaming that my husband constantly kept his back turned to me and our young son for up to 10 hours a day, seven days a week. I can understand how you can be obsessed with gaming, I loved gaming for a little while myself, but now I don’t have time. My husband and I did share a lot of interests before out son was born. Now I’m left holding the baby whilst he battles it out on Eve Online, often going to bed at 3am. A bit of time to remember he’s a dad as well as a husband would be the nice, just to show us he’s not turned into some deaf, selfish Elf at Christmas!


Andrea,
England


My fiance plays computer games quite a lot especially since the Xbox live was activated in our area but like someone else said if it wasn’t gaming then it could be the pub or gambling etc. At the end of the day it’s only a hobby and I have hobbies too. It makes him happy and that should be the most important thing.
Sarah Wilson, United Kingdom

I like watching my other half play on his Xbox, it helps him relax after a hard day at work and its usually better than watching some rubbish on TV. He turns it off when we eat dinner and it never keeps him up all night because it has a ’save’ feature.
Anne, Notts, UK



I’ve witnessed my usually lovely bloke turn into a cross-eyed twitching warrior and tripped over many a console cable in the process



Sarah, Surrey

I couldn’t help but laugh after reading your games widow article. I too have suffered the loss of a partner to that evil black box in the corner of the room. I’ve witnessed my usually lovely bloke turn into a cross-eyed twitching warrior and tripped over many a console cable in the process. One day I decided enough was enough and thought “if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.” In came broadband, Xbox Live and seriously, it turned out not so bad. Those evenings of the pre-menstrual kind are now whiled away screaming abuse at some American at the other end of the line and killing aliens and bugs in the most unsavoury manor. Great once a month but only in small doses. I’d still take a bath and box of choccies any day.
Sarah, Surrey, UK


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News - Sex attacker’s victim speaks out

Source News - Sex attacker’s victim speaks out article

A woman who was assaulted by a serial sex attacker in east Manchester has said the ordeal has left her “in a constant state of fear”.

Police in Gorton believe six attacks that have taken place since February 2004 may be the work of one man.

One of the victims, who does not want to be identified, urged other women to be on their guard.

“Whenever I think of him it makes me feel sick and what he has done to me is disgusting,” she said.

“I used to be a carefree, bubbly individual who didn’t think twice about going out on my own but this has changed me and how I go about my life.

“I would say to women out to make sure they think about their personal safety. You may have lived in your area a while but you never know who is out there so it’s best to make sure you stay safe.

Gorton sex attacks
0220 BST, 9 February - An 18-year-old woman is sexually assaulted in Melland playing fields

2130 BST, 25 June - Attempted attack on a 16-year-old girl in the same fields

2230 BST, 3 July - Attempted attack on a 19-year-old woman in Glencastle Road

2230 BST, 9 July - A 15-year-old girl is sexually assaulted in Hyde Road

1900 BST, 26 July - Attack on a 25-year-old woman

0100 BST, 8 August - A 20-year-old woman is raped in Debdale Park, near Hyde Road

“If anyone has any information they must come forward.

“I’ve spoken in the hope that my experience can jog someone’s memory and stop this happening to someone else.

“He can’t be allowed to stay at large,” she said.

Detectives believe six attacks since February 2004 in Gorton may be the work of one man.

Patrols have been increased permanently in the Tan Yard Brow and Melland playing fields areas, where the attacks have been concentrated.

In the latest incident on 8 August, a 20-year-old woman was raped.

Police say there are a number of similarities in the descriptions given by victims.

They say the man is white, aged 20 to 30, about 5ft 10ins to 6ft tall, with a local accent and deep voice.

He normally wears casual clothing with a hood or hat - possibly a beanie-style hat - covering his face.

Anyone with information is urged to ring Greater Manchester Police or Crimestoppers.


See related site about

News - Upwardly gothic

Behind the black hair dye and white make-up goths are simply art lovers, who aspire to middle-class values, says a new study. Is that right?

The moment their teenage son or daughter dyes their hair black and starts getting creative with eyeliner can be a nightmare for parents. But a report suggests it should be a time for celebration.

Goths are likely to grow up to be doctors, lawyers or architects, the study by Sussex University says.

They are refined and sensitive, keen on poetry and books, not big on drugs or anti-social behaviour. They are also likely to carry on being goths into their adult life.

They have an ability to express their feelings and are believers in romance rather than one-night stands, it says. In fact, the only things dark about them are their clothing and their sarcastic sense of humour.

WHY GOTHS?
The term comes from Germanic tribe that invaded the Roman Empire in the 3rd to 5th centuries
Goth was thought to be first used to describe bands around 1979, with Joy Division and Siouxsie and the Banshees
There are sub cultures within the sub culture, such as cyber goths
Goth band Bauhaus graced the cover of Smash Hits in 1982

“They won’t like me saying it, but their lifestyle, unlike the punk scene, is a middle-class sub culture,” says Dunja Brill, who carried out the study.

“They are usually intelligent youngsters who have rejected the idea that teenagers must fulfil certain criteria.”

But is that right? Will the pale faced, sullen-looking teenage goth next door end up being your bank manager in 10 years’ time? The Magazine headed to the gothic Mecca that is Camden Market to find out.

“Where I live it’s usually the chavs who start all the trouble not the goths, so I think we are quite a peaceful lot,” says Antoinette Drakes, 16.

“We just mind our own business and get on with what we like to do. But goths are like any other group, a lot depends on the individual.

“On the whole we are quite sensitive but you get some who aren’t, who are just posers and are just on the pull. Some will end up being doctors and some will end up being unemployed. Goths are a mix of personalities, just like everyone else.”

Antoinette Drakes

‘Chavs cause trouble’

But Keeley Dale, 18, says the study is just putting another label on goths.

“It’s always about labels in today’s society and that exactly why I dress the way I do, I don’t want to fit into other people’s stereotypes,” she says.

“So I’m not only a goth now, I’m also aspiring middle class. What is that anyway? I don’t want to be a doctor and read the Daily Telegraph, I want to be a writer and read whatever takes my fancy.

“There are some things that I do recognise in this research, goths can be sensitive and aren’t usually violent, but at the end of the day I think such things depend on the person, not the way they choose to dress.”

Mia Joseph, 40, has been a goth since her early teens and says it is a way of life for her now. She runs a market stall specialising in gothic wear, leather and PVC.

Threatening

“It’s not about fitting in to a particular subculture, this is just my life. I’m beyond thinking of myself as a goth, I’m just me.

“There are characteristics in the study that I think are true, goths do tend to be peaceful and sensitive, interested in literature and it is a way of life for many that continues long into adulthood. Why that is middle class I don’t know.

“I think people are a lot more accepting of us now. Years ago people found my piercing and tattoos threatening, now they are part of everyday life. A lot of people have their nose pierced or a tattoo.

Boots

Essential footwear for a goth

“I have grannies who come up to me and say they wish they’d been able to dress the way I do when they were younger.”

But there is one trait that seems to cross all teenage sub cultures, whatever they wear, whatever music they listen to and whatever a study says - and that is sex.

“Of course I want to fall in love, but I’m fully prepared to try out quite a few ladies to find the right one,” says Dan Taylor, 18.

“I’m still a hormonally-charged teenager after all, as well as a goth.”


Keeley shouldn’t worry about Goth’s reading the Daily Telegraph. Goth’s tend to have socialist political views. Furthermore from 10 years of being a Goth I’d say they are more class less than middle class, that’s sort of the appeal of the scene.
Vicky, London

I tend to agree with this column, Most of “us” have jobs and we mostly work in high tech where its not what you look like, but can you do the job! Yeah the older ones look at the newbies with pride because they tend turn out ok.
Bill, San Jose Ca. USA

I’ve been a goth for well over ten years now, it’s a big part of my identity. I’m currently a phD student researching Chemistry, and although it may suprise some people, I’m not even the only goth in my lab. It’s good to see that someone is attempting to shake off the bad image we goths sometimes get.
Ross Forgan, Edinburgh

Back in 80-84 my mates and I loved the banshees and the cure,they would do the eyeliner and the black lippy while I was happy to listen to the music.
None of them are doctors or lawyers or fulfilling artistic ambition of any kind.neither are they still cutting around in pvc trousers or slashed t shirts…they have grown up…they have kids of their own and no doubt will fret just like our folks over their sons and daughters going out dressed ‘like that!’ the only sustainable element of the goth era was the music…it was brilliant then and brilliant now! Robert Smith for Prime Minister!
mic docherty, Cairo Egypt

I am a 40-something Goth (and have been since my late teens), so is my teenager daughter and my 20-something partner. I would say its definitely a way of life for a me but although I am educated to degree level, I wouldn’t say I have particularly middle-class values. I foresee being a ‘Goth’ until the day I die as it is a part of who I am rather than just a fashion trend or a phase I am going through.
Vicky, Leicester

being a goth myself i agree that goths are more likely to be intelligent and artistic. i come from a working class background, so don’t agree that it’s a middle-class thing. but it’s certainly fun to be in the company of like-minded people
eamonn, brighton

Please don’t lump Siouxsie and the Banshees in with the terrible ‘Goth’ movement. The Banshees may have inadvertantly started the movement but they couldn’t control it. Thats why its so bad!
Goth is pure pantomime- silly clothes, silly music by fools for fools. Sisters of Mercy, The Mission, Fields of the Nephilim- all vile. The Banshees were musical innovators- its a shame Goth didn’t take more notice to them…
Simon Jones, London

This is news? Goths have always started off as the kids who were bullied at school for being intelligent or geeky, so of course they’ll end up in the more prestigious jobs. It’s the “normal” blokes wearing white shirts and drinking Stella that cause the trouble in town centres at night. This is obvious to anyone who’s actually met a goth and who doesn’t just rely on tabloid stereotypes.
Alice, Brighton

I get accused of being a goth because of the black hair, piercings, evil demeanor etc. But i’m not a real goth (or is that the test?)- i work for the National Trust and do loads of activism with Greenpeace and other groups in my spare time. I wish other “goths” would be less mopey and apathetic and down on the world and take action to change it instead of just superficial aesthetic rebellion!
Felicity, London

It makes perfect sense that authorities and people generally frown on Goths. Goths quite simply have learned to think for themselves and express their own views. Something not generally approved by the state

Paolo
Paolo, St Albans

I certainly would prefer a child of mine to be a goth than some tracksuited-baseball-cap-wearing gobby hoody. I know which one would concern me more! I would certainly hold out more hope of a goth actually knuckling down and getting on in life.
Mary, London

Yet more stereotyping and thinly-veiled patronising. Attitude and lifestyle maketh not the goth - it’s a club and music scene and nothing more. Those who choose to take the fashion onto the streets are very welcome to - I myself show a tad of it at times - but it’s becoming very tiresome to see every black-wearing, shelley-reading intellectual labeled as such. The BBC misses the point once again
Tom, Reading, UK

During the late ’80s and early ’90s I got in to being a goth. The music, the scene and above all the people were brilliant, absolute diamonds. Although we’ve all grown up and drifted apart there are few days when I don’t think back to those heady days when we were head to toe in black. Goths shouldn’t be afraid of labels and certainly shouldn’t be afraid to shatter the paradigms. As to the middle class bit, now I’m a Chartered Marketer… Guilty as charged I guess.
Scott, Tamworth (previously Swindon)

Given her rejection of the concept surely Keeley shouldn’t label the middle classes as ‘doctors who read the Daily Telegraph’?
Laura, Lincoln

Why do people need to follow like sheep and label their taste. I have always had my own personal and very individual style,considered in my teens to my 30’s,as gothy, weird,striking, unusual etc.Some elements of which are very much still here(I am now 50)but more in tune with my changing shape and years!!I never wanted to look like anyone else or follow anyone else, and if someone thought my image was bad or a problem, it was actually their problem, I know who I am.

jan, suffolk

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